Trouvaille

London November 2020 The sad thing about life is, we spend too much time thinking about others, and not enough about ourselves. We fear that we'd be tagged as selfish, too busy, too involved in our own self. Most of what we do is out of love, affection, belonging and the eventual fulfilment of expectations.  None of this is eternal. Not even one.  We yet don't think before going lengths for those who consistently treat us as average. We are blinded quite literally by the perception of the love we have built in our minds and that fails to stop us. Love only grows out of a good heart, it only pours out of the heart that has a lack of love. You'd never find someone who's perfectly happy and contented with themselves, going about giving love and kisses and sweet wishes to everyone around them.  I agree, perfect and happy is a subjective concept and it's probably not even true. But people who are often enough with love, are quite and keep it to themselves. They continue ...

  Photo: Pinterest                I just finished watching the movie - One Day, starring Anne Hathaway and Jim Sturgess, playing Emma and Dexter in a life-like film that starts in 1988 and goes on till 2011.  Emma and Dexter, meet after their graduation and decide to kick it off, although things don't go as planned, and the next thing you know they become more than what sex defines humans to be.  This is not a movie review, for that you can waste your time somewhere else, and that makes it the very reason that I am not obliged to hide anything from you. Emma one fine morning rides her bicycle to go meet the love of her life who is waiting in a cafe, and gets run over by a truck on the streets of London, a place where I currently live, she never comes back from death and hence - all I can say is Emma and Dexter meet every year on the 15th of July except one.  I don't know how Dexter made it without her his entire life, living of...

I have reached that point in life again where I am simply, tired.  There is a part inside me which pushes me to keep going but there is another part that just constantly yells: 'Quit!' I am not sure if you have faced something similar.  Exhaustion is a better adjective to describe my situation but it still doesn't seem enough. This officially is my rock bottom. The best part about being here is knowing the fact that it only goes up.  But being at this low, breathing life here, existing here is the most difficult thing to do. I have a list of blogs to write and there is nothing pushing me to do that. I do realize that people are my source to the whole idea of 'Keep Going', I haven't talked to a lot of my regulars since almost three weeks, and although it feels like forever, this small period of detachment has redefined what it feels like to be living without a source of happiness and encouragement.  I am really starting to question, 'Do my peers really have i...

I am tired now, more than I was before, and this doesn't seem to get any better. Every new day. Seems a decade away, while I hate growing old. So I sit in oblivion and sleep untimely, I trust every new story a little too blindly. I crib for no reason, and change like a season unaware, uncalled, undue. I simply make an issue out of everything, I do realize that I am missing something. But I don't know what it is, so I wonder. I wonder, Will we still be in love once this is over? Will we still know what friendship feels like? Will we take risks like we did before? Will we be less cautious or more? Will we think twice before we eat? Will we be vegetarians or still choose meat? Will we care about what brands we wear? Will we simply try to just be there? Will we find peace in everything that we see? Will we be in chaos, a chaos that is me? Will we value the streets we walk on? Will we know what life was like in a lawn? Will we love the sky a lit...

This will not make sense to you. [Me and Vivian Castelino in this world] I am recollecting a phase where I wrote almost every alternate day and I found joy in doing so. I was someone who also had a daily diary that was actually a ranting session with a book that did nothing more but listen to me. I stopped writing 2 years back for myself and changed ways. I wrote for people, surroundings and the things that happen in our society. It was so life-changing. I came across so many things and somehow it helped me get out of my small world and see for myself If I could be of any help to this world. I have no clue how my writings have helped the world in the past two years. I don't know if it has helped in the first place, but after a long time, I feel a sudden need to write for myself, for the things I missed on in the past two years and now that I think of it, I could have written so much. Every second day, I keep telling myself, 'We'll start today Rahul, It's...

"There are some people in the world, who you can love and love and love, no matter what."  (No, I am not talking about you Anubhav) My mind hasn't stopped wondering about this sentence, since I scrolled through it on Instagram and the amount of truth that it actually holds. I have struggled through the 5 pm Chai, every evening, just to figure out if this is really possible?   Do we humans actually have the ability to keep giving to this world and not feel slightly, even slightly, to have something back in return? This abundance of love that we carry, this baggage of sorrow that always looks tiny in front of this Joy, this happiness. Love that in the most actual sense knows no limits, love that not only happen between two birds but the one that happens between a Sheep and a Lion. This entire concept of The Art of Giving and Loving the world, with the flaws and the drawbacks, its all so absurd! What would surprise you is the amount of confidence and happiness an...

 IF YOU COULD SEE ME NOW.  After battling through yesterday I realized everyday is a new battle, hence, this morning I was prepared.  I took a glimpse of everything around, the trees were there, waters too, and so was the sky. but  not you. Wait, The air was very much around. I could still hear my sound. I didn't go. Spring didn't go. but you did. Even though you promised, you wouldn't. Now who do I call out to? The spring? Will it call me the way you use to? Spring father's more children, Maybe a million every year. How sorrowful must that be? Once they all leave. Is my pain even close to that of Spring's? Now my shoes are torn. Not because they don't fit me anymore. Rather, it's time I put myself into yours. My brains don't work, my way. It works your way. The hard way. My heart doesn't beat only for four, It beats a little more. Yet it ...

The Theory of Nothing. He shyly said, 'It all starts with nothing. but  continued to explain his theory. Simply taught me, At times, you have no choice. I could not understand why he was eerie! I was all ears, when he said confusion, things went to over-thinking, so common . But something went cracking down my heart dear, the fear to speak and panic had left none. So, I heard it all and still wasn't tired. I wanted to be the first audience. I so knew it would not take anything more, A little of courage, trust and  obedience. To you I write, The world is waiting, pal. Speak loud for they should know and you should grow. R.B

LETTING GO IN JAIPUR-MANALI.. So, currently I am staying at Shuru, Manali at a friends place and this place could freeze me to death. For someone like me who has spent his last 18 years in Bombay where sweating and stinking is like our thing, coming to a place where you don't sweat and never stink is astounding. This Jaipur-Manali bus that I took on 1st November at 2:45 pm which reached Manali next day at 1:30 pm took my life away from me. It was almost a 24 hour journey that I will probably never forget. One of my very few and good friend talks about something called as "Me Time" well this bus journey gave me a lot of that. Time that I spent just staring at the sky and the trees and farms that left me and my company just like people did or maybe they still do. How I wish I could feel the wind if that bus wasn't Air Conditioned. I covered up for that loss on the beautiful streets of Manali. A very good critic of mine, expressed his thoughts on my la...

LETTING IT GO- IN JAIPUR. I am at present in Jaipur, for those who are reading me. I left Indore for Jaipur on 26th October, a cold wednesday at around 7 in the evening and was standing on the  Kushabhau Thakrey Marg nearly 25 minutes from our hotel Siddhant. Took a Tuk-Tuk which got punctured in the middle of the highway and then got a tempo. This bus got us to Kota at 6:30 in the morning, a bumpy ride for sure. Kota the city of corporates wasn't that cold. The sun rose as my eyes rose to take a glance of the city.  the well read and heard  stories of  school books and pictures seen of industries polluting the city was for the first time witnessed by me. Jaipur was nearly 240 kms away from Kota and the journey till the city was horrible, thanks to the Roadways. Sindhi camp was where we got down around 12:30 pm on 27th October and passed through Durgapura to reach home. They call this, 'The Pink City' dont get them wrong, the sky isn't pink, ...

Dear 50 year old me, I hope you are alive, knowing how unpredictable life is and moreover I hope you are happy with who you are. I know the thought of death crosses your mind a thousand times and you still make it to the next day. You know how uncertain life is and I need not tell you the incidents you have had to know how it feels to be alive and to breathe. You are lucky. You have no clue, how much I pray for your happiness and what things I do to make sure everything falls in the right place at least by the time you're 50. I so wish that you love yourself more now, please do. You know its been eighteen years and I still haven't achieved that goal. I hope you have stopped denoting things. I hope you take out time for yourself and write something everyday. I am sure by now you know the significance of "Me Time".See to it that you are happy and only then go around the world making others feel the same. I may sound like a narcissist 18 year old, but think about i...

           Every Good Thing comes to an end?                When I write or speak those above mentioned words, I say it for all. I haven't written since 8th march 2016, that would be the international women's day. I always thought so that you needed a brilliant idea or a great concept to write something worth reading for whatsoever audience I have. I was so wrong. You only need one statement. Period. After waiting for my HSC board examinations to end and then my so called vacation, following the results and admissions and hell lot of reasons to not write, it took me five minutes to get to my desk and start an article.(This reminds me, I have to write about HSC, wait for it.)  People have made statements about, how some old things have to end, so some new things can begin. It might be true, it might be not. I always believed in the theory of e...

                                         HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY!                “Hello? It`s me!”  With this song reverberating your ears all the time, I am sure you know who wrote it, Adele! Taylor swift won the album of the year at the Grammy’s if I am not wrong. The movie Neerja has left people known to more than just a story, hopefully Indians now know that there is an award called as “ The Neerja Bhanot Award ” for bravery and self-duty. Ms. Kangana Ranaut, had a striking career in the past year. No one is unknown to both, Ms. Sania Mirza and Ms. Saina Nehwal and their remarkable contribution in the field of sports. Ms. Smriti Irani has left people numb with her astounding speeches. Robin Chaurasiya has been nominated for The Global Teacher Prize 2016 and is in the top 10 w...

                                                                The Awaited Evolution!                                               Women and everything that environs them has progressed so far, except the men and their mindset. We are a population of over 1.2 billion, and half of them are more interested to know who’s the Miss India, rather than knowing, who just got raped in the town! We Indians are busy marrying off our 5-7 year old daughters, or rather killing them when they are yet not in this world. The women, irrespective of their attire are raped. This shows the quality of men, we have to deal with!  Extra-marital affairs, Unprotected Sex, Assault ,Abortion, Girl Child Killing, Child Ma...

READ                            Greetings to all the readers, lately I haven’t been posting a lot, since I was appearing for my HSC examination. The exam is over. (Yayayayayayayyayay- it might not be the happiest feeling for you, but here, inside…… I feel the freedom.) When you are in 11 th , you probably live in obscurity and the time you step in your college for the second year, unexpectedly the whole world knows about it. Your parents start the daily doses, they start giving you autobiographical examples of eminent personalities and expect you to remember the success mantras. I know you don’t give a single shit about it, neither did I. It’s absurd that none of my relatives ever happen to buzz me on my extra-curricular achievements, but they do come home with expensive pens and wish me for the boards. They most unexpected people call you to make you r...

GIVE ME A MOMENT I just stopped by your house, And relived the good old time. When smiles blossomed, laughs played And we were just fine. I am flabbergasted, drowned in fear, What if there is no tomorrow? Give me a moment of happiness, today Don’t let me breath the sorrow It’s all ways loss, and no one gain Let’s fetch the worst phase of us, I could stitch it, fix it, bend it a bit  Can we get back to our buzz? I walked by the very lane yesterday, Where we built dreams like a game. Give me a moment of that memory, dear I am an unchangeable bigot, let me die of shame.                                                                       ...